Lyrics from “DC Happy Hour” (a duet)

Chorus: There…Is…A Pretty Girl

Looking At ME!

WowOwEeee

WowOwEeee

(sung by partner) Yeah Man, she works for a non-profit

You’ve probably never heard of it (Chorus)

lyrics from "VampirEmo"

- she’s stuck at sixteen, in the middle of America

let me introduce to you, Vampire Erica

she’s in love with a boy

who promised to take care-a-ya

but she can’t tell him what’s what

because nothin’s scarieya

- nooooothing will chaaaange

everything will stay the saaame

eeeternaaaalyyyy teeeenaaage

She’s-a-TeenageEternal!

Eeeternaaaalyyyy teeeenaage

She’s-a-TeenageEternal!

- She wants to suuck bloooood

But not…hiiiiiis…blooooood

Anybooooody’s blood

ButSheWon’tHangWithAnyoneElse

Scenes and Lines from Magnum Gun Laude:

- This summer, there’s a new definition of Thesis Defense (BLAM BLAM BLAM)

- When they took Kirk’s thesis, they didn’t realize he was going to take on the entire Mafia. Alone. (Chainsaw sound)

- “I’m going to make you famous.”

“Why?”

“Everyone gets famous when they’re work is published…posthumously.” (BLAM BLAM BLAM)

What's Scarier Than A Sphere (pt. 2 - JH)

"Are you sure this it?" asked Shatbutt, staring through the ship's porthole. Shatbutt looked at Mezmar's reflection in the window and heard the nearly inaudible response: "It's not as I remembered."

They both looked through the window at a broken planet. Or half of it; thousands of pureblack shards were floating in orbit. Shatbutt and Mezmar watched as a fragment of the planet loosened and floated into the circling and silent black wake.

Mezmar floated away from the window and made a soft metallic tock as he hit the floor. Shatbutt did not know how to comfort the orb, but Mezmar's moment of mourning soon passed. With the same rumble of his first announcement, Shatbutt said "I join my cause to yours. Where you go, so do I. Where you die, so do I."

The dark orb floated to the door, and it buckled under Mezmar’s slow and incredible pressure. The fist-sized hinges cracked. The door collapsed. Mezmar hung in the opening.

Guards yelled down the hall and once they fired, Mezmar floated in their direction. Shatbutt sat stunned in the cell and could only hear the laser fire, the yells, and much worse, the sound of crushed armor and skull. When it became silent, Shatbutt went to the door and saw Mezmar on the foot of a fallen guard. The guard had passed out and lay tremoring as Mezmar rolled up his leg, snapping armor and leaving his leg a flattened bit of flesh in a pool of blood. The guard shook until Mezmar rolled over his face.

What's Scarier Than A Sphere? (part 1 - Alan Mellish)

As the eerie green fog cleared in the docking bay, Commander Jim Shatbutt drew his XR-29 Hand Cannon. Even though he was wearing his TQA Approved (Terran Quality Assurance) Heat Jumper (TM), the Commander could not help the goose-bumps that rose on his skin when the Object came into sight. The Object was like nothing he had ever seen before: a perfect sphere of black marble appeared to have docked in his spacecraft!

As he recovered himself, the Commander though grimly, The Drill Sergeants at Alpha Romero Academy never mentioned this in basic training. But before he could complete this thought, his mind was reeling once again. This time, however, from sound and not sight.

"I AM MEZMAR OF MEZMERON!" said the Sphere in a deep primeval rumble. Jim Shatbutt tightened his grip on the XR-29 Hand Cannon once again…

The Final Moment Is Always The First (By John Henry)

“Ziiiicaaaaam” John yelled, cradling the pudgy little alien near the downed spaceship. There’s little to no blood in a blaster fight, because the lasers cauterize the wounds instantly. There was no blood, but there was the sickening smell of burned fur and flesh.

“You better not go, you ugly little gremlin.” Zicam’s tremoring stopped as quickly as it started it. His eyes slowly rolled over to look at John, and he whispered haltingly in his alien tonge: “know…what…life…is worth.” With that final comment, Zicam’s body deflated into a sac of loose bones.

It would take years for John to understand what Zicam’s final words meant. Years until the rage died out of him. Years until Zicam’s killers were slaughtered by the bone-weapon John created from Zicam’s ribs and tossed into the crags of Nardrul. But in Time and Tears, it would come.